For Such A Time As This...

I vow it Bellas.

With every last breath.

I vow to bring beauty, and encouragement and inspiration 

to the doorstep of your hearts!!

It's becoming increasingly clear on how to begin doing that, 

but even more so, I acknowledge that the process has already begun!!

And really, it started quite some time ago...

Every endeavor, 

every step, 

every misstep,

every challenge,

every obstacle,

every lesson, 

has been preparation.

Preparation to play my role in a much larger story.

While I've always understood that in a general way,

the conviction has become more tangible than ever before.

I spent some time this past week evaluating the journey,

from my very first job to present day and everything in between.

I mean really bringing a magnifying glass down to it all...

Every bit of volunteering, classes, seminars, life experiences.

And I began thinking more intently on the skills 

that have been developed over time, 

the lessons learned...

I've been in training this whole time!!!

I wasn't prepared to leave a lasting footprint....until now.

In the late hours of the night,

I feel the nudge...I'm getting called out on my bad habits. ha!!!!

That's a good thing!!! Believe me I need it, how else am I going to fly

if I'm not willing to let go of the things that are weighing me down.

Routines and mindsets have to change, paradigms have to shift...

Each one of us have all of the internal discipline that we need 

to make the kind of daily choices that are essential to walk out the process.  

Bellas, you are eyewitnesses to my pilgrimage, my story...

So tell me, what will your story be?? What will your legacy be?? 

Each one of you has a God given destiny and purpose
 that only you can fulfill,

and I shall never tire of reminding you of that.

"Our lives were meant to be lived 
with purpose and intent, 
not mediocre default." 
~ Delatorro McNeal

Sometimes...

Yeah, I know.

You don't have to tell me.

The world is broken.

But for crying out loud I am determined to be some glue.

In my own small way, I want to be a part of the healing.

My friend Jan posted this statement 

on her facebook page several weeks ago, 

and I can't stop thinking of the implications!! 

She said: 

"Remember, 

there are many Sauls 

that are one encounter away 

from being the Pauls 

God called them to be." 

Profound.

Never underestimate what God can do in people's lives, 

no matter what the circumstances look like,

no matter what they claim to believe or not believe.

I am reminded once again to love people WHERE THEY'RE AT.

We have the tendency to want to try to help "fix" so often,

and truly with the very best of intentions.

But sometimes people just need a break

 from being under the microscope.

Not everyone wants to be analyzed ALL the time. 

Sometimes they just need the freedom to be where they're at, 

even if it's in a messed up place right now,

without worrying whether or not we're breaking down

 every little thing they say or do. 

Sometimes they just need the grace to "be" 

and the room to "become." 

I'm not talking about setting healthy boundaries with people, 

clearly that's necessary at times, nobody needs to be a doormat.

I'm simply saying that we have no time to love people

 if we're always in analytical mode.

Sometimes people just need a touch IN SPITE OF where they're at.

xoxo Keep Shining Sweet Bellas xoxo

The Sea Lion...

"We were meant to live for so much more,

 but we lost ourselves..." Switchfoot

We're a bunch of networkers, aren't we? 

It comes naturally to us, we love to share our finds! 

Great restaurants we stumbled upon, 

great movies we saw, great books we devoured.

"Waking The Dead." "The Sacred Romance." "Desire."

These three books by John Eldredge have come 

more highly recommended by me

than any other to date.

My friends, family, and acquaintances alike 

have heard me rave time and again.

Those who've had the courage to dive in and read them,

have found them to be game changers, just as I found them to be.

This story below is special to me.

It's an excerpt from "Desire" by John Eldredge,

a true favorite of mine, as you already know,

and I discovered it during a time when I needed it most.

I hope it touches you, as it did me, but more than that,

I hope it awakens something deep within your heart,

something that stirs your inner man,

something that makes you feel compelled to rise to the occasion,

to live out your purpose, 

and be who you are destined to be.

Once upon a time there lived a sea lion who had lost the sea. He lived in a country known as the barren lands. High on a plateau, far from any coast, it was a place so dry and dusty that it could only be called a desert. A kind of course grass grew in patches here and there, and a few trees were scattered across the horizon. But mostly, it was dust. And sometimes the wind, which together made one very thirsty. Of course, it must seem strange to you that such a beautiful creature should wind up in a desert at all. He was, mind you, a sea lion. But things like this do happen.

How the sea lion came to the barren lands, no one could remember. It all seemed so very long ago, in fact, it appeared as though he had always been there. Not that he belonged in such an arid place. How could that be? He was, after all, a sea lion. But as you know, once you have lived so long in a certain spot, no matter how odd, you come to think of it as home.

There was a time, many years back, when the sea lion knew he was lost. In those days, he would stop every traveler he met to see if he might help him find his way back to the sea. But no one seemed to know the way.

On he searched, but never finding. After years without success, the sea lion took refuge beneath a solitary tree beside a very small water hole. The tree provided refuge from the burning rays of the sun., which was very fierce in that place. And the water hole, though small and muddy, was wet, in its own way. Here he settled down and got on as best he could. Had you journeyed in those days through the barren lands, you might have seen the sea lion for your self. Quite often in the evening, he would go and sit upon his favourite rock, a very large boulder, which lifted him off the burning sand and allowed him a view of the entire country.

There he would remain for hours into the night, silhouetted against the sky. And on the best of nights, when the wind shifted to the east, a faint smell of salt air would come to him on the breeze. Then he would close his eyes and imagine himself once more at the sea. When he lay himself down to sleep, he would dream of a vast, deep ocean. Twisting and turning, diving and twirling, he would swim and swim. When he woke, he thought he heard the sound of breakers.....

The sea was calling to him.

The sea lion loved his rock, and he even loved waiting night after night for the sea breezes that might come. Especially he loved the dreams those memories would stir. But as you well know, even the best of dreams cannot go on, and in the morning when the sea lion woke, he was still in the barren lands. Sometimes he would close his eyes and try to fall back asleep. It never seemed to work, for the sun was always very bright. 

Eventually, it became too much for him to bear. He began to visit his rock only on occasion. "I have too much too do," he told himself. "I cannot waste my time just idling about." He really did not have so much to do. The truth of it was, waking so far from home was such a disappointment, he did not want to have those wonderful dreams anymore. The day finally came when he stopped going to his rock altogether, and he no longer lifted his nose to the wind when the sea breezes blew.

The sea lion was not entirely alone in those parts. For it was there he met the tortoise. Now this tortoise was an ancient creature, so weathered by his life in the barren lands that at first, the sea lion mistook him for a rock. He told the tortoise of his plight, hoping that this wise one might be able to help him. "Perhaps," the tortoise mused, "this is the sea." His eyes appeared to be shut against the bright sun, but he was watching the sea lion very closely. The sea lion swept his flippers once against his side, gliding to end of the water hole and back. "I don't know," he said. "it isn't very deep." "Isn't it?" "Somehow, I thought the sea would be broader, deeper. At least, I hoped so."

"You must learn to be happy here," the tortoise told him one day. "For it is unlikely you shall ever find this sea of yours." Deep in his old shriveled heart, the tortoise envied the sea lion and his sea. “But I belong the sea. We are made for each other." 

"Perhaps. But you have been gone so long now, the sea has probably forgotten you."This thought had never occurred to the sea lion. But it was true, he had been gone for a long, long time. "If this is not my home, how can I ever feel at home here?" the sea lion asked. "You will, in time." The tortoise appeared to be squinting, his eyes a thin slit. "I have seen the sea, and it is no better than what you have found here." "You have seen the sea!" "yes. Come closer," whispered the tortoise, "and I will tell you a secret. I am not a tortoise. I am a sea turtle. But I left the sea of my own accord, many years ago, in search of better things. If you stay with me, I will tell you stories of my adventures."

The stories of the ancient tortoise were enchanting and soon cast their spell upon the sea lion. As weeks passed into months, his memory of the sea faded. "The desert," whispered the tortoise, "is all that is, or was, or will ever be." When the sun grew fierce and burned his skin, the sea lion would hide in the shade of the tree, listening to the tales woven by the tortoise. When the dry winds cracked his flippers and filled his eyes with dust, the sea lion would retreat to the water hole. And so the sea lion remained, living his days between water hole and tree. 

The sea no longer filled his dreams.

It was that May that the winds began to blow. The sea lion had grown used to the wind, and at first he did not pay much heed at all. Years of desert life had taught him to turn his back in the direction from which the wind came and cover his eyes with his flippers, so that the dust would not get in. Eventually the winds would always pass. But not this time. Day and night it came, howling across the barren lands. There was nothing to stop its fury, nothing to even slow it down. For forty days and forty nights the wind blew. And then, just as suddenly as it begun, it stopped. The sea lion lifted himself to have a look around. He could hardly believe his eyes.

Every single leaf had been stripped from his tree. The branches that had remained, with only a twig or two upon them, looked like an old scarecrow. And I do not need to tell you that there was no longer any shade in which to hide. But worse than this, much worse indeed, was what the sea lion saw next. The water hole was completely dry.

Three weeks after the wind ceased to blow, the sea lion had a dream. Now, as I told you before, there were nights in which he had dreamed of the sea. But those were long ago and nearly forgotten. Even still, the ocean that filled his dreams this night was so beautiful and clear, so vast and deep, it was as if he was seeing it for the very first time. The sunlight glittered on its surface, and as he dived, the waters all around him shone like an emerald. I he swam quite deep, it turned to jade, cool dark and mysterious. But he was never frightened, not at all. For I must tell you that in all his dreams of the sea, he had never before found himself in the company of other sea lions. This night there were many, round about him, diving and turning, spinning and twirling. They were playing.

Oh, how he hated to wake from that wonderful dream. The tears running down his face were the first wet thing he had felt in three weeks. But he did not pause even to wipe them away, he did not pause, in fact, for anything at all. He set his face to the east, and began to walk the best a sea lion can.

"Where are you going?" asked the tortoise.

"I am going to find the sea!"

Sweet Bellas, have you, too, lost your way?  

It's easy to get off track, isn't it? 

Where have you settled?

Can you hear your calling in the late hours of night,
 can you feel the longing? 

Are there voices in your life discouraging you? 
Misery does love company after all...

The question is, what are you going to do about it?

Right here, right now?

Will you return to the sea?

Never Tear Us Apart...

You all have heard of Ashley Madison, or maybe you haven't. Hopefully you haven't.

I saw one of their brazen ads the other day, it read, "Life is short, have an affair."

Sigh. Really??? Is it really socially acceptable to lie and cheat?

No longer shameful or taboo, just boldly out there on billboards, 

in magazine and internet ads, even competing for super bowl time slots

to make a wider audience "aware" of their services.

It really makes my spirit cringe.

Considering today's divorce statistics, being married for 16 years is kind of a big deal.

16 years!! The Sweet Sixteen. That's some cool beans right there.

But CLEARLY, there are a million ways we can drift apart.

A million ways we can lie to each other.

A million ways we can lead secret lives...

It's really just a click away, a channel away, a chat room away, a text away...isn't it?

There is no shortage of temptations and distractions these days,

and it takes a real purposing of heart to stay invested 
and cultivate our relationships DAILY. 

Marriage is a gift. Truly a gift. Don't drop the ball on this one, 

make the time to water the plant and keep the flowers in bloom.

Like a beautiful garden, if we don't nurture and tend it, 
the weeds will come and choke the life out.

Neglect can make us slowly wither inside and lead "quiet lives of desperation."

And that's a recipe for disaster. A bona fide hazardous threat. The Danger Zone.

You see it all around...on both sides of the table.

We can easily become so consumed with our own endeavors 

that we begin to lose touch without even realizing it.
Our work schedules may keep us apart.

Look, we're all busy. Our to do-lists are growing. Our laundry baskets are overflowing.

We're juggling babies and calendars and paperwork and demands.

Some seasons of our lives are more tiring and overwhelming than others, 

and can leave us feeling disconnected ~ but don't be discouraged.

Even the simplest, most subtle gestures can massage the heart and awaken the senses.

Today I want to encourage you to discover, and rediscover...

to go deeper than you've gone before...

become more vulnerable than you've been before. More uninhibited.

Let your hair down, drop the OCD, ditch the routine.

Be playful, be ridiculous, be spontaneous.

Smile. Leave love notes.

Smile more. Kiss more. Embrace more. 

Cook a meal together, dance in the kitchen.

UNPLUG when you're together.

Speak encouragement, avoid sarcasm & negativity.
(and criticism & nagging...)

Did I mention smile more?

Take a walk, listen to old music, build something together.

Pick up a copy of "The Love Dare" and try it.
Don't wait for the other person to initiate,
take action now!

Whatever you do, don't let "them" get in the way.

The Ashley Madisons of the world. The cynics.

Watch for the wolves. Protect your assets.
At the end of the day, only God can meet the deepest needs of your heart,

but your marriage is sacred and valuable.

Make it a decree to "Never tear us apart."

"What God has joined together, let no man separate." Matthew 19:6

16 years and Walking on Water

This past September 2012,

Anthony & I celebrated 16 years of marriage!

How awesome is that???

And what an adventure it has been...I do not say that lightly.

I CONTINUALLY marvel at the dynamics of our personalities, 

our thinking patterns, our moxie.

I've often seen people paired that seem to have more...equilibrium.

One person tends to be the risk taker, 

while the other is more "level headed" so to say,

often bringing some balance to the equation.

But not us. No Sir-ee. Ha!

God really got some fireworks when He put "us" 

over "the Divine Bunsen Burner,"

or so I imagine...

and that's gotta make Him smile.

It sure makes me smile.

You see, we BOTH are visionaries.

Risk takers. 

Adventurers.

Tight rope walkers.

Mountain scalers.

We've always been driven by the unction

that if you want to walk on water,

you've got to get out of the boat!!!

It's required stepping away from the comfort zone,

the safe, the predictable, even in every day simple choices.

I honestly don't think we know any other way to live...

This mindset is woven into our very essence, rooted somewhere deep in our core.

Sometimes, in the late hours of the night, we feel the tug...a stirring...

beckoning us, summoning us, daring us to go deeper,

to ditch the standard and go against the flow...to live outside the box.

But the journey hasn't been without opposition.

It's taken courage to walk the path set before us

regardless of the whispers, discouragement 

and head shakes of disapproval from those on the outside looking in.

Yet with every scathe and scrape along the way, 

there have been monumental life changing principles and knowledge 

gleaned in the process.

I assure you it's been worth every moment, high and low.

And the best is yet to come.

God is stretching us and enlarging the place of our tent in the most glorious ways.

Seeds that have been planted in our hearts from years ago are sprouting.

Visions & dreams that plucked our heart strings in the not too distant past 

are being breathed to life for such a time as this.

Like the opening quote, I truly believe that 

"Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage."

We can stay in the safety zone, or go beyond, but our horizons will adjust accordingly.

Well Sweet Bellas, 

I'm here to declare to you, 

and all the world,

 that not only do I have the courage...

but I was made to walk on water!!!

MORE!!!!

What on earth has been keeping me so busy 

that I haven't posted since SEPTEMBER 2012??!!

Well, if you must know, 

there were a few pressing matters to hold my attention, including, but not limited to: 

16th wedding anniversary reflections (quiet, but meaningful), 

an impromptu girlie spa weekend (can someone say EXHALE),

38th birthday frolic (the spoils ran-eth over)

the death of my step father (that was a biggie),

my last child's 1st birthday (talk about a milestone), 

3 rounds of sickness running through our household (mommy mode in full swing)

and tons of holiday mingles (3am, night after night, week after week)

I can honestly say that there hasn't been one single solitary dull moment to speak of.

I plan to rewind a bit in upcoming posts

and share some extended thoughts on the aforementioned.

But for now, I'd like to report that this year has started off deliciously.

While I acknowledge that each year will bring it's own challenges,

I feel stronger than ever, and believe me, not in my own strength,

Lords knows that's long since been depleted...

but in His presence.  

I feel His tenacious grip leading me forward, navigating.

It's as though I'm a child again, sitting in the back seat 

as my parents drive to an exciting destination,

with no concern for the journey at hand, simply enjoying the panoramic view.

I'm a soul at rest.

I have been very purposeful with my thoughts & time,

trying to savor those little moments, sucking the marrow out of each and every morsel,

every crack and crevice,

putting aside what's necessary at the moment to fully engage,

especially with the children.

7 loads of laundry to do? eh, whatevs...my son just got 

a star wars millennium falcon playset, it can wait!!

I have been making more time to enjoy the simple pleasures,

more time for more laughter,

more music,

more books,

more tea!!! (hello cinnamon tempest tea you scrumptious lil treasure you),

more hot baths,

more dreaming,

more silliness...

I've been going to bed earlier, 

waking up earlier, 

exercising those neglected limbs (ouch!).

Praying even more,

and am being very intentional about

stepping out into a place that demands God's Word to operate.

I've never been one to live in the safety zone anyway, quite frankly it bores me.

More on that soon...

I will undoubtedly be blogging about my upcoming adventures in regards to all of that,

but even now, geeking out on nerdy Sci-Fi shows with the Hubs,

"pinning" bizarre novelty gadget items just for kicks, rummaging through old cassettes,

Jabba the Hut pancakes & Ring Around The Rosie on the trampoline,

bachelor snacks, playoffs, pillow fights..

Unedited, unscripted, first rate, good ol' fashioned FUN!

The kind of smiles that put a slab of whipped cream, extra sprinkles,

and a big fat cherry on top 

of an otherwise ordinary day.

Yeah, the good stuff...

In the words of Ferris Bueller, 

"Life moves pretty fast. If you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it."